March Happenings!

This past month has been so fun filled and entertaining and has gone by EXTREMELY fast. There have been some huge changes and happenings lately here at CFCI Nicaragua. First and foremost, my friend Kate Maccarone came to visit me for a week. She got here March 8th, and we had a great time exploring and viewing the beautiful country of Nicaragua. We visited the tourists’ attractions of course, with my wonderful host family as guides. We went to Granada, and Catarina and the Masaya Volcano. She really enjoyed her time here and it was great to catch up and to be able to share my experience and what I do daily with someone so special to me. I miss her so much but it was great. I think we watched a totally of four movies while she was here. We were in no way bored, but it was her spring break from school and we wanted to relax. I took her to work with me for a day and it was great to have here there! The clinic was not as busy as it usually is on Mondays, but she got a little taste of what I do. The next thing that happened was another medical brigade from South Carolina came down and the CFCI staff and the team ventured to Matagalpa. It is about a 2.5-hour drive from Managua into the northeastern part of the country about 4,300 feet above sea level. It was very chilly at night and very relaxing and quiet where we stayed. We stayed at a hotel named “Selva Negra”, which means black forest in English. It is owned by Germans, so the food was prepared and usually not the typical Nicaraguan food. It was very nice to be able to work with a team that got along and mixed so well. We had three different generations there and we all got along so well. Usually at the end of a week mission trip as many of you know, there tend to be little cliques formed and this group had none! I could talk to someone 62 years old and then turn around and talk to someone who is in their mid 40’s and enjoy my conversation just as much with both people! It was awesome to see God move in people’s lives. I saw miracles happen. 40 people accepted God as their Lord and Savior, one man said he wants to move to Nicaragua and that he has known in for a while, he just needs to act, and I saw patients (like as a doctor). These were all things that I remember clearly from the brigade. I saw about 60-70 patients during the compilation of these four days and each day was a totally different experience. Some of the days I did not feel great, but I knew I had to keep going and push through, because these people have never had an American team visit and needed this blessing more than I needed to lay down and rest. This pain I had was causing me to lean over because it was one of the only comfortable positions that allowed me to feel a little better. I saw a number of patients who needed the typical Ibuprofen or Acetaminophen for pain that they get regularly down here because they live in this dreadful heat and do not drink enough water. It is very common here for the locals to get headaches or back aches and overall body aches because they do not drink even the equivalent to one bottle of water. But I also got to see some patients who needed just someone to listen to them and others who needed some cool things like warts or moles removed. If you know me well, I am into things like that and getting the self-satisfaction of taking away things that people think are ugly; my prime example and ultimate favorite is popping pimples. I know it may seem gross, but it is something I like doing. I also got to inject a muscle relaxant into a ladies knee. She was having joint pain and Dr. Kyle (orthopedic) helped guide me to where to inject this medicine and it was a great experience. This team brought down 19 people. Two doctors, two physical therapists, a PA, guys for construction, people to work in the pharmacy, people to work triage, and people to play with the kids. Usually with a team that size, you have a great effect on the community you are outreaching to. We saw 40 people accept Jesus, which is awesome! This country has a huge Catholic influence and it is hard to sway their views. I was able to pray for each of my patients individually and it was a blessing to be able to pray in Spanish with each person. Some would look at me and give me a huge embrace before leaving the consult area and others would shake my hand and thanking me for all I did. I was in awe of the kindness of people and their willingness to open up to me as their doctor. This was a great team and I had the pleasure of getting to know everyone on a deep level! I have even looked into Greenville (the town in South Carolina) as a place to possibly live in the future. A lot of people said they would house me until I get on my feet. I am definitely considering it! Praise God for people who are willing to be so kind and courteous! I am having the time of my life down here and I wouldn’t change it for anything! Traveling and getting to serve the people of this beautiful country is what I absolutely love! Another huge thing happened this past month. Shelby; the other missionary and my beloved friend left to go back home to Minnesota where it is cold and so I am once again solo ☹ Many people were blessed by her abilities and gifts she used while she was down here and it was great to work along side her and see her gifts reach the hearts and souls of Nicaraguans and the people she shared them with. She was so happy and such a joy to be around all the time and it was great having her here with me to share my stories with and to hear her progress as a person and in her work here as well. I loved how she was so devoted and a “go getter”. She felt bored on some afternoons so she made it appoint to look into working with another organization and made her mark there as well! It was an awesome person to be with for the past two and a half months. She is already greatly missed here! I hope she is not freezing in the snow in Minnesota! I hear it is quite cold up in the states for this time of year. Well, you’re lucky, I would trade a week of snow for a day of this heat. Trust me people, you have it good! As many of you may know already or heard through the grape vine, that I became sick or have been sick for a little while and just went to get tested and found that I have something that many people get doing missions or traveling. I am on medications for a certain intestinal worm, but still 100% unsure of what one I have, and who knows, maybe I will never bee 100% sure. I have had God guide the steps of people into my life to specifically help me and advise me on what they think should work best with past job experiences and things they have researched for many years. I have also come to realize and have known for a while that some of the most vulnerable people are those who are sick. Sick people with terminal illnesses, sick people with chronic reoccurrences, and sick people with unbearable pain are the most vulnerable. I think I would place myself into the last category. Sometimes this pain required me to stop all activity and just sit and rest and just wait until the pain went away. I have told my mom that if it keeps happening, I am coming home soon. I was determined that I would come home and leave because it was so bad. I know this attack is from the devil and it is a spiritual attack. The devil knows what I am up to for God and he is mad. The devil is angry and wants to pull me back down to where I once was. But too bad, the devil needs to face it and know that I will NEVER turn back or be the person I once was because those times are forgotten and forgiven by the gracious and loving king I call my father and Lord of my life! He is my creator, my life, my soul, and my reason! Nothing else matters with out him because I would not be matter with out him ;) This week I am not at work once again and I feel bad, I feel like I have skipped this whole month at the clinic. This week in Nicaragua is “Semana Santa” which means holy week in English. It is about that time of year for Easter to roll around and I am going to miss hunting in my house for an Easter basket ☹ (maybe I am a little too old for that) But I like living as a kid every once in a while. I have had many special people on the CFCI team step up to bat for me while being sick; taking me under their wing, bringing me to their house to stay, bringing me to their house to enjoy some games and a meal. I love the team I am here with and it is such a cool thing to have Christian friends and be able to share the same beliefs and hang out! It truly changes your desires and your perspective on life when you are continually filled with people who uplift you rather than try to derange your thoughts and pollute them with bad things. I am so blessed to be a part of this team! It is an answer to my prayers! Thank you all for keeping me in your prayers! Specific prayer requests I have for this upcoming month and next couple weeks: Please pray that this sickness is eradicated and the tests are negative when I get re-checked for the intestinal worm I have. Please pray that as I start to look for job opportunities at home that doors are opened and so is my heart to new possibilities. Please pray for these last 5 months to be the most impactful and that God continues to use me as much as he can! I am so honored to be a follower of Christ and love every second of it. Without the help of all my financial support and continued prayers, I would not be sitting here in the heat sweating and writing this blog post! Keep the prayers coming! I am on this wonderful journey and only want you to feel like your by my side! Enjoy! Thanks for reading!

6 month video! Thanks for your support!

God is your life. Living in surrender to HIM.

I have been studying the book Deuteronomy lately and I absolutely love it. I have realized that Moses did a lot of work and spent a lot of time with the Lord. He would spend 40 nights and days at a time in his presence totally consumed by him. Today that is nearly impossible for people. We have technology that exceeds the speed we have never thought possible. We have “to-do” lists that are extremely full and have no room for one more thing because it may be impossible to finish the tasks we have set before us for one day. We have the capacity to schedule years in advance at the touch of our fingers on our “smart phones”. Moses obviously didn’t have that; he had it much better and much more convenient than we do today. He had total access to God and his presence. You may be thinking, we have total access to God as well and you are absolutely right. Today I am going to explain the recent findings I have come across while studying the best tool given to humans today; the bible. In Deuteronomy, the main passages or the most important passages that have impacted me the most are these four that follow. Deut 30:20. …”you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life, and he will give you many years in the land he swore to your fathers, Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.” How amazing is it to think about the fact that the Lord is your life. What does that mean to you? Because to me, it means that all these things of this world are only a vapor, a short time, and the things we do today affect our eternity. In James it says 14 whereas you do not know what will happen tomorrow. For what is your life? It is even a vapor that appears for a little time and then vanishes away. This makes me thankful for the life I have been given; the freedom, the free will to choose to love God and serve him whole-heartedly and trust in him for everything. I have never before attempted to seek him like I have since I have been here in Nicaragua. I have time to think. I could choose to use the time to make negative thoughts, think about what to do tomorrow, what I could be doing better. Those are all thoughts of the devil. Thinking about tomorrow is pointless because God holds the future. He holds your life, he is your life! Negative thinking is something that has been a huge part of my past. When negative people surrounded me, my attitude would turn and make a 180 turn down the wrong path. My mom even took notice to this. She could detect this change over the telephone (but all of us know our moms have a 6th sense and know when their children are hurting). If your thoughts are consumed with what you could be doing better; it’s the devil saying your not doing good enough. As missionaries, our boss is God. What we do for Him that brings glory to His name is all he asks. He desires a relationship with his children. Deut 20:4. “For the Lord your God is the one who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you your victory.” Now regress to what I just mentioned above; the devil putting negative thoughts in your head. God fights the enemy for you. When you devote your time to him and allow him access to the fears, He will take them and discard them elsewhere. I know this all to well. I have been afraid way to many times and haven’t given God my fears and tried to take them on my own. This is a heavy and hard burden to carry. It weighs you down, makes you tired, makes you want to give up, and even quit on the things God may have put on your heart for you to do. In Isaiah 41:10 it says: Fear not, for I am with you; Be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, Yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’ I know this verse all too well because it is the verse my mom sent me once while I was down here and told her “I am done”, “I can’t do this anymore”, and “I want to come home.” God fought my battle and my time passed and now I am at peace and have confidence he is the one leading me each and every day. I used to wake up and think, “Ok, what do I have to do today?” With that kind of thought process, I was easily tired, and most definitely easily disappointed because I was trying to work, giving of my time, loving the people, AND trying to fight my own battles. People, trust me, it doesn’t work all that well (especially when you can’t understand the language your are engulfed in). Deut 10:17-20. “For the Lord your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality and accepts no bribes. He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing. And you are to love those who are aliens, for yourselves were aliens in Egypt. Fear the Lord your God and serve him. Hold fast to him and take your oaths in his name. He is your praise; he is your God…” I absolutely LOVE this verse. I believe it describes the missionary life. We have the God of gods and the Lord of lords on our side! He doesn’t accept bribes. Our boss won’t let us leave early if we promise to work harder tomorrow. Each and everyday, he expects our best; our hearts, our souls, and our minds to be completely fixed on Him. He will then take our hand and lead us to where he wants us to go. He is mighty and awesome! I know those seem like mundane words that are used to describe our God, but in actuality the word “awesome” means something causing awe or terror. The word mighty means having or showing great power, skill, strength, or force. I would say these words fit God perfectly and probably will use them less now for the things of this world. Loving the alien is what us missionaries love doing (or at least I do). Loving the people most people ignore, loving the aliens that most people look down upon, and loving the broken who have lost hope in themselves and don’t know who holds their future. The little acts of giving someone food and clothes can go a long way in today’s world. And especially in the country we are in. The simple act of telling patients at the clinic that some medications are donated puts a smile on their face; a sigh of relief shortly follows. Its like I can hear their thoughts (“glad I don’t have to sacrifice my food tonight for 30 more pills to control my blood pressure”, or “Thank God this medication for circulation was donated because the doctor said my heart has a lot of hardened and almost clogged arteries and if I don’t get something to help me, another heart attack is right around the corner.”) It makes me happy that the people at the clinic I work at have the opportunity to receive free medicines and makes me appreciate the people in America a little more knowing they package and put time, money, and energy into us down here in Nicaragua. Fearing the Lord your God for Christians means something that is very much a relief to me. In Hebrews 12 it says 28 Therefore let us be grateful for receiving a kingdom that cannot be shaken, and thus let us offer to God acceptable worship, with reverence and awe, 29 for our God is a consuming fire. This reverence or deep respect and awe should be the motivating factor for us to surrender to the Creator of the Universe. Deut 4:29. “But if you from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find him if you look for him with all your heart and with all your soul.” This is a short verse, but so perfectly said. Think about how you personally seek God. Is it on the way to your job in the car? Is it praying in the early morning at 4:00AM before no one else is awake and the world is quiet? Is it at night right before you get into bed and prepare yourself for a new day ahead? For me, it is turning my music on, shutting my eyes, meditating on the words of songs and either humming them or singing them softly. They are my words to God. I absolutely love music and the beautiful sound it makes and when I turn music on to meditate and think about God, I feel fully consumed and devoured by his presence (in a good way of course). But you have to put forth the effort. God won’t open to door if you don’t knock. He won’t carry you if you hold on to your own baggage and fears. He won’t comfort you when you don’t confide in him. These are all things you have to surrender to him with ALL of your heart and with ALL of your soul. In Matthew 7 it says it perfectly 7 “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. 8 For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. I am challenging my fellow friends and family to do just this. Spend your quiet time fully consumed by his love and his spirit and allow your thoughts to be his thoughts and your work to be his work. This is a hard task. We must renew our cup with his spirit and passions, because ours will eventually run out of fuel. This past weekend I was in Costa Rica and I absolutely loved it. At church the preacher had a candle and fish bowl and was preaching on a verse in Revelations but I could not understand much because the accent there is a little different and the echo of the microphone also didn’t help me pick up much. But, I kind of was thinking what I am about to share while he was preaching about something using the same artifacts. 1. Picture a fishbowl and picture a lit candle. The candle is you and your fire for God and the fishbowl is the world. 2. When you are surrounded by the fishbowl, upside down it represents the world. This world is heavy; though you don’t feel all the weight. This world is draining and surrounding you at all angles. This world is suffocating and will eventually burn your fire or light out if you are surrounded by it and don’t give up time each day for God to operate on your heart and allow you to breathe and share with him your heart. 3. Scientifically, the fire will eventually be put out because oxygen is not reaching the candle and allowing it to keep burning. 4. It metaphorically represents the world and the weight of the world on our shoulders. Like the verses earlier, we need to seek God with all out heart and soul, and allow him to fight our battles. 5. Now picture the fire lit and your inside the fishbowl and it is right side up. 6. This represents you in the world, but spending time with God each and everyday. The fishbowl represents God’s shield he places around your heart when you devote and dedicate your time to him. You won’t be burnt out and your heart won’t wear the weight of your problems and your shoulders will feel relieved and lightened when you hand over your problems to him. I ask you to think about when and where you spend the most time with God and this week definitely go there and give God your heart and your soul. He is your life! I absolutely admire the work God is doing in each of our hearts and each of us has an important role to play in this thing we call life. I can’t even begin to understand God and why he does the things he does. But I totally understand He loves me and desires me to love him and seek him with my whole heart and soul. He desires for all his children to spend time with him and he wants us to have a relationship with him. He wants us to surrender and he is willing to carry us when we fall and when we stumble. We will all make mistakes and none of us our perfect, but we have a God that made the world and is perfectly protecting our hearts.