Transformed Heart

This past week, I spent my time in Matagalpa, Nicaragua; where a team from Grace Community Church from Greenville South Carolina worked in the community. I was very blessed and felt God’s presence working out everything perfectly. Us as humans think we will have everything under control and we might even try to take control when things don’t seem to be going the way WE planned or want. I have learned that no matter who can’t come or what can’t be done; God is in total control. For example I was planning on seeing about 150 patients in three and a half days but ended up seeing over 250. God worked everything out so perfectly! It seems like a tragedy when things don’t go our way, but in Romans 8:28 I am always reminded that “God works for the good of those who love him according to his purpose.” I am always reminded of his amazing Grace and Majesty when I find myself looking for my own strength and at the end of the day realizing it was only Him who got me through and who was able to see me through to finish the work set before me. I am so blessed and blown away by the people who were touched and what was done during this trip. I even was able to pray in Spanish for about 15 minutes with a woman of the church we worked with while we were finishing up our worship time on Wednesday night. I became great friends with her and her daughter was my favorite. The kids here have captured my heart and I don’t want to take that away from them. Whenever I get the chance, I just pour out my love, hugs, and kisses to the children who come looking. I know when people from Nicaragua first see Americans; they think, “They are dangerous, powerful, scary people.” Some don’t, but this week we as a group received a letter from a pastor that said just that. We come to a place attempting to show love and compassion, but until these people get to see us in action and working together for God’s glory, they see us as dangerous. I was blown away and kind of broken by this thought because of course, groups only want to make a lasting impression and not impose nightmares upon these people. I was surprised that by the end of this information given, the Nicaraguan who had written this letter asked for an apology because he knew we only came with good intentions and his interpretations and perspectives were skewed. I learned a lot about myself on this trip and learned that I am insufficient and worth nothing without God and the Holy Spirit alive within me. I had some mixed feelings going into this trip and wasn’t sure what to expect. I sure didn’t expect to be one of two people seeing patients and I didn’t expect to have someone from the pharmacy to be missing in the afternoon to cover up for a woman unable to come because of reoccurring migraines. I could never possibly fathom what God was doing when all these occurrences happened. He already knew from the very beginning how he would knit this team together and how he would allow us to function as best we could. There were some ups and downs and there were many things I thought would fall to pieces, but right before they hit the ground with a crash, God picked them up to allow glory and honor to be given to Him. I was blown away time after time when God picked things up that I thought would be disastrous. I also learned that my attitude needs to remain calm and positive going into hectic weeks that I will be away from my comforts in Managua and my home. I was going into this week with expectations that were not glorifying to God and honestly, I was wrong with my thoughts. I was quickly taught that not my desires or my expectations, but His would be done in ALL things. This was the same place and hotel we went to last time with a group and I ended up being sick. I was very cautious with all things brought to my mouth to consume this time and had a little bloating and constipation, but I am convinced it is what comes with being a missionary. Thank God, I didn't end up sick like I was last time and I was able to work effectively and efficiently through the whole week. This group brought three different groups down to Nicaragua. They had a pastors teaching group that taught two different groups of people. Pastors from all over Matagalpa Nicaragua came and the women learned of a book presented from Grace Church titled “Ezer” and the men learned a series of roundtable discussions and lessons from two men from Grace Church. They also brought some teachers down to team up with NCA (Nicaragua Christian Academy) in Matagalpa and head over there for the day to help or assist the teachers there with planning and seeing the way they run their school. There was a lot done and it was a blessing to hear from the two different teams I was unable to participate in. The last team they brought down was at the local church we partnered with and we set up a clinic in the church and the children were entertained with games by two group members. Some local church members were helping us with getting sheets filled out with the patients’ basic information and we had two people from our group working triage as well. The local church members also had an evangelical section where people would go after their consult with the doctor to talk about their faith. We had two people (an ER doctor and myself) seeing patients and about 4 or 5 people working in the pharmacy filling prescriptions. We saw over 511 patients in three and a half days, 39 people accepted Christ, 44 people re-dedicated their life to Jesus, and 1,935 prescriptions were filled. So just think about the huge party that went on in heaven this past week! You may think; “wow, these people accept Jesus and then go on their way”, but your wrong; they get contacted from the church and invited to all services held during a week. They aren’t abandoned like they were before they accepted Jesus into their lives; they are treated as his beloved and cherished children. They are now adopted sons and daughters like all of us who know Christ. It was a great time to wrap up my last week of working for CFCI. I got to see some old friends and make new ones with the group that came and it was a great week because it was just after my birthday! I had my dream come true; eating Chic-fil-A on Nicaraguan soil! There was a promise made long ago that was actually followed through with; I got my chicken sandwich after about 72 hours. I put it in the microwave; added a little ranch and some pickles and its like nothing you would ever expect! It was a glorious lunch the day I left for Matagalpa. I leave next week on Tuesday to spend a week of relaxation and unwinding with my mom and my aunt Gloria. I am so excited to travel the country of Costa Rica with them both and very excited to make another trip there. While I am there, I will visit the base there and get a tour of the place there with the nurse currently serving there for CFCI-Costa Rica. I am so excited to see how God guides me and speaks to me on this trip about my next chapter in life I am getting ready to open and where he wants me. I am also using this time to re-think my last ten and a half months spent here in Nicaragua and what I learned and how to better comprehend myself as a changed person, and what to expect when I return to the United States. I expect myself to be very emotionally unstable like I was when I first arrived here because I was not in my comfort zone. After almost a year of adapting and learning a different culture than your native one, it becomes very comfortable and adapting like I have has taught me that not only the United States culture is fitting for myself. I can easily adapt and fit in wherever I need to. I am so touched by the people, places, and things I have learned while here. It has surely humbled my thoughts, calmed my spirit, and transformed my heart like nothing I could have even dreamed. I have felt touched and protected by God during the whole time I have spent in Nicaragua. These brigades and trips just remind me how grand and powerful our God is and how many brothers and sisters in Christ I have all around the world waiting for the gospel and love of God to be poured out into their souls and onto their lives. I please ask you to be praying for the people of Matagalpa and the group from Grace Community Church as they return to the States. I know transitions must be hard and I am about to experience my own, so I will see how it all goes personally. But please also keep my mother, my aunt, and myself in your prayers as we venture across Costa Rica for my last “hoorah”. I am planning on writing one more time before I return to the states, but if it doesn’t happen, don’t say I didn’t warn you ;) I hope this finds you all well and thank you for partnering with me during this chapter in my life. I have loved most moments and will never forget how God has transformed my heart. I will honestly try to live by the changes that have taken place and I will also need prayer with that. I know that going back into a culture so easily distracted by the things of this world, it is easy to “slip” back into my old way of things. I am praying for strength from God and asking him to place people around me who will only lift me up and I ask you to do the same for me.